Showing posts with label Al Franken. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Al Franken. Show all posts

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Really?

Take a good, long, look at this ballot and tell me how it is possibly not a vote for Norm Coleman in the Minnesota State Senate race. There's no way. Its not possible for a human being to make this mark in the oval beside Norm Coleman's name without the intention of voting for him. No decent human being could argue otherwise. I know, we are talking about Al Franken here, but he must have some basic (albeit hidden) shred of humanity somewhere within him.

What possible scenarios could explain this ballot's existence in a supposedly good, decent, and well ordered universe if it is not a vote for Norm Coleman? Did the voter have a seizure as he entered the voting booth, pen in hand, yet somehow managed to accidentally submit his ballot to the machine as the poll monitors frantically tried to stop him from swallowing his tongue? Is he a slightly mentally handicapped, schizophrenic, paranoid, psychotic who believes Norm Coleman has been reading his mail, stealing his newspaper, and sodomizing his dog, who upon seeing Norm Coleman's name, shrieked something about the Carlyle Group and the most recent Indiana Jones film as he frantically scribbled x's next to Coleman's name in an effort to emphasize his distaste for the incumbent? Did the voter, being legally retarded, think he was voting for Coleman to be kicked off Survivor?

I suppose no one can really know what this man, woman, or dead ACORN registeree was thinking when they made a mark in the oval next to Norm Coleman's name, but I think the safest assumption would be that they were voting for Coleman. But that's only if we're coming from a position of "ethics" and "faith in Democracy". In a spirit of bipartisanship, I think we should look at it from the Franken campaign's point of view. Put yourself in their shoes. What may seem imbecilic at best to the rest of us makes perfect sense if you're trying to steal an election.